Immortals

(2011)

Genres: Action, Drama, Fantasy

Review: Immortals

Transcript for Review: Immortals

CHRISTY LEMIRE:
Our next movie is "Immortals," which vaguely resembles Greek mythology, but actually has more in common with the movie "300." It's a nonsensical, overloaded cacophony of carnage in totally needless 3-D. Mickey Rourke plays the ruthless and bloodthirsty King Hyperion, who's storming across Greece with his massive army. Only one man can stop him -- the hunky and frequently shirtless Theseus, played by Henry Cavill.

Theseus gets some help in his quest from the wise-cracking Stavros, played by Stephen Dorff, and a beautiful virgin oracle played by Freida Pinto. The gods on high are supposed to just watch what these mortals do and not get involved, but it's boring up there, and sometimes they can't help themselves.

King Hyperion, dressed in his evil bunny-rabbit helmet, eventually captures the thing he'd been seeking all along: a magical bow that shoots an endless stream of metallic, laser-like arrows. Between that and his mighty troops, he would seem unstoppable. But Theseus and his smaller army have heart on their side. And you can just imagine this rousing pep talk being played on Jumbotrons at stadiums across the country in hopes of inspiring come-from-behind victories.

"Immortals" comes from director Tarsem Singh, who has a music video background. And if you've seen any of his previous movies "The Cell" or "The Fall" you know he's an obsessive visual stylist. There's a lot of CGI-enhanced enormity but Singh is also fetishistic about detail. Hyperion's brutally minimalist lair could be the lobby of a boutique hotel, and the costumes are straight out of a Lady Gaga concert. As cool-looking as "Immortals" can be, it's also repetitive and overlong, and the violence -- especially the slow-motion beheadings -- just become numbing after a while. Thumbs down from me.

IGNATIY VISHNEVETSKY:

It’s a thumbs up for me.

CHRISTY:

Wow, explain that.

IGNATIY:

Watching this film I didn’t care what was going to happen to the characters. I didn’t care what the plot was or where the plot was going.

CHRISTY:

Shouldn’t you though?

IGNATIY:

The only thing I cared about was what Tarsem Singh, what kind of slow-motion, fantastic tableaux Tarsem Singh was going to come up with next.

CHRISTY:

Okay.

IGNATIY:

Um, I find this film to be you know there’s not much in terms of plot and character. Um…

CHRISTY:

That’s phrasing it kindly, okay.

IGNATIY:

But visually it’s very compelling, and I completely disagree with you about the 3D being needless because I think, uh, Singh has a really great imagination for spaces, for these sets and I think the..the depth that 3D offers; the sense of depth that it offers really helps. I don’t think this would have been as compelling if I had seen it as 2D as I did in 3D.

CHRISTY:

Most of the 3D though is like someone’s body is getting slashed in half and the blood is coming spurting at us. And like the first couple of times it’s oh okay we’re going to do that with this, okay, and then, it gets really repetitive.

IGNATIY:

No, but he is also doing these things with what’s going on in the background with these very interesting sets that he has built and some of these are actual locations. I think this is often quite a beautiful movie. Not a very smart movie, but you know it’s very rare that you see an action movie or you know even a fantasy movie made now-a-days that pays this much attention to the visuals and to me that…that’s the reason why I’m giving it a thumbs up. I found the visuals really compelling.

CHRISTY:

This is a long music video. That’s all this is. There’s barely any kind of plot. Mickey Rourke kind of just like broods and grumbles and eats and throws food, and he’s a cartoon.

IGNATIY:

But as long as the grumbling and eating and throwing food is this stunningly production designed, I’m okay with it.

CHRISTY:

All right.